


Total Eclipse Of The Heart

by selfishloser



Category: Destiny (Video Games)
Genre: Angst, Dead Cayde-6 (Destiny), F/M, Grief/Mourning, In Memory of Cayde-6 (Destiny), Self-Harm, Suicide
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-02
Updated: 2020-11-29
Packaged: 2021-03-07 02:20:39
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,279
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26249344
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/selfishloser/pseuds/selfishloser
Summary: This was inspired by the title, sung by Bonnie Tyler.
Relationships: Cayde-6 (Destiny)/Reader, Cayde-6/Female Guardian (Destiny), Cayde-6/Guardian (Destiny)
Comments: 4
Kudos: 21





	1. Chapter 1

_Turn around,  
__  
Every now and then I get a little bit lonely and you're never coming 'round.  
  
  
  
_The Tower was silent. Not a single noise could be heard except the howling wind. There was no one at the courtyard, besides a certain guardian, who was kneeling in front of a metal engraving.   
  
It's been a year ever since **_that_** incident happened. A year - a whole year she spent grieving and _mourning_ over his death. She couldn't carry on her duties as a Guardian - she couldn't even bring herself to leave the Tower.   
  
  
  
_Turn around,  
_  
_Every now and then I get a little bit tired of listening to the sound of my tears.  
  
  
  
_She was sick, so very sick of everyone trying to comfort her - tell her that she still has the responsibilities of a Guardian. She was sick of people trying to _ease her pain_.   
  
Every night, she would kneel at this very same spot, staring at the metal engraving as she cried until the break of dawn.  
  
  
  
_Turn around,_  
  
_Every now and then I get a little bit nervous that the best of all the years have gone by.  
  
  
  
_She couldn't understand why he had to be the one that died. She kept blaming herself, cursing herself, reminding herself that she could have saved him if she was stronger and quicker.  
  
She made sure she remembered that her beloved Exo, _**Cayde-6**_ , was dead because of her - by dragging a sharp metal blade across her wrists.   
  
  
  
_Turn around,_  
  
_Every now and then I get a little bit terrified and then I see the look in your eyes.  
  
  
  
_She'd always think about how she got together with that handsome devil, and how she was so damn lucky to have him as her partner.   
  
Cayde was cunning, brave, loving, and a fucking amazing hugger. She missed his hugs - sure, they felt cold but it would always warm her heart.  
  
  
  
_Turn around, bright eyes,_  
  
_Every now and then I fall apart._  
  
_Turn around, bright eyes,_  
  
_Every now and then I fall apart.  
  
  
  
_She knew that she couldn't give up on herself like this, she _knew_ that if she were to _take her own life_ , she'd make him disappointed.   
  
She knew that she couldn't give up on herself like this, she _knew_ that if she were to _take her own life,_ she'd make him disappointed - or will he perhaps understand what she's going through?  
  
Maybe he will forgive her for choosing this path, forgive her for wanting to _end her suffering_ , forgive her for being **_weak, forgive her for not being able to save him.  
  
_**Maybe she doesn't have to suffer anymore - she could just end this, right here, right now.   
  
  
  
_And I need you now tonight,_  
  
_And I need you more than ever,  
  
  
_  
The Guardian stood up from the ground - knees bruised from kneeling for hours as she walked towards the metal railing.   
  
Her eyes were focused on the Traveller.   
  
  
  
_And if you only hold me tight,_  
  
_We'll be holding on forever._  
  
  
  
"Hey, big guy. After a year of kneeling here in front of you, this is the first time I've actually spoken to you."  
  
Her voice was almost like a whisper, trembling as she bit her lip and fought back the tears that want to stream down her cheeks.  
  
  
  
_And we'll only be making it right,_  
  
_'Cause we'll never be wrong.  
  
  
  
_"Tell me, how is he?"  
  
She gazed at the Traveller, reaching her hand out as if she's hoping to grasp something, grasp _him._  
  
  
  
_Together we can take it to the end of the line,_  
  
_Your love is like a shadow on me all of the time,_  
  
_All of the time.  
  
  
  
_She wanted to scream.  
  
She wanted to scream out loud.  
  
She wanted to scream out loud at the Traveller, asking _why_ didn't it try to save Cayde?   
  
  
  
_I don't know what to do and I'm always in the dark,  
_  
_We're living in a powder keg and giving off sparks._  
  
  
  
"I just want to hold him again, am I asking for too much?"   
  
She curled her fists, digging her nails into her palms - She holds onto the memory of Cayde-6 embracing her.  
  
  
  
_**I really need you tonight,  
  
  
  
**_"I just want to hold him, _I need to hold him again. **Please.**_ "   
  
  
  
_Forever's gonna start tonight,_  
  
_Forever's gonna start tonight.  
  
  
  
_She dropped down to her knees, banging her head against the metal railing as she sobbed, sobbed, and sobbed.  
  
She couldn't handle this anymore, she _had_ to end her suffering. She wanted to see Cayde again, that's all she's been wishing for the past year. Just to see his face once more - to stare into his light blue optics.  
  
  
  
_Once upon a time,  
  
I was falling in love,_  
  
_But now I'm only falling apart.  
  
  
  
_She pulled herself up to stand on her feet, tears still falling down from her face.  
  
"Ghost?" She whispered as she called out her friend - whom she had not seen for a year.  
  
"Ah, right, he's not here anymore.." She gritted her teeth, not wanting to recall back to what she did to her own Ghost - how she _abandoned_ him.  
  
  
  
_There's nothing I can do,_  
  
_A total eclipse of the heart.  
  
  
  
_Weakly, she boosted herself over the metal railing, now clutching onto it from behind as she looked up - never once straight nor down.  
  
" _Cayde, I'm coming home._ "  
  
  
  
_Once upon a time,_  
  
_There was light in my life,_  
  
_But now there's only love in the dark.  
  
  
  
  
_This was the end.  
  
She can finally be free, be free from this _aching pain._  
  
She couldn't wait to be with her Exo once more, at a place where they will never be separated again.  
  
  
  
_Nothing I can say,_  
  
_A total eclipse of the heart.  
  
  
  
  
_Her grip on the metal railings started to loosen up, as she finally let go.  
  
And she fell.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
"There's my favourite Guardian."


	2. Reprise.

Her lifeless body was found after several days by a supplier.   
  
  
_**Everyone**_ was devasted when they saw her body, pale and frail.   
  
Ikora couldn't handle the death of a close friend again, Zavala reached his breaking point and Amanda- She _**loved**_ her, loved her as much as she loved Cayde.   
  
  
The Drifter was indifferent about your death, but he sure does miss the _spark_ she had in her. Eris, on the other hand, had a soft spot for this Guardian.   
  
After all, she was the only one who always stuck around to listen to her tales regarding the mysteries of the Darkness.   
  
  
However, the person who took the news badly was Petra.   
  
  
She hated herself for bringing Cayde and his partner, the Guardian down to the prison. Cayde's death was already enough to push her over the edge- and now his partner, his beloved Guardian is dead too?  
  
**_~~How was she supposed to live knowing that she killed both of them?  
  
~~_**  
No- she **_has_** to continue living in this wretched place.   
  
  
For Cayde, for The Guardian, for her two best friends.   
  
But she isn't strong enough.   
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
"Ah, would you look at this?"  
  
The Fallen reached into the sack of dead ghosts that his associate has collected and pulled out a peculiar looking Ghost.  
  
  
He knew exactly whose Ghost this belonged to.   
  
  
"What a pity, she was a good customer indeed." He fidgeted with the Ghost, then proceeded to place it carefully on top of the crate next to him.  
  
_It truly is a shame I won't be able to bargain with her again.  
  
  
  
_  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
Eventually, everyone moved on.   
  
Everything was back to normal- but not quite entirely normal.  
  
  
The people at the Tower would talk about the presence of two souls at the ramen stall that Cayde loved.   
  
Of course, it's just a rumor that went around.   
  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading.


End file.
